March is really kind of a lull month for blogging. Perhaps more writing takes place this month than any other time throughout the year, but it all happens in my private journal and tucked away at night. It’s my birthday month, so inevitably it brings reflection and thoughts for the future.
It’s too easy for me to get stuck in my own head and feel frozen, unable to cope with my feelings or enter the present moment. My 2014 resolution word, mindfulness has really stopped me in my tracks. It’s forced me to reevaluate some of my habits that aren’t conducive to a healthy lifestyle, or at least not the life that I want to lead.
I really want to dig my feet into the soil of this thing called life and cultivate something truly amazing. I needed a little time away from the screens to be present with my family and plant some positive seeds for healthy growth and habits.
One thing I realized in my time of reflection is that I need to take the time to love myself. It feels so silly to write, because I feel like ‘Of course I love myself,’ but I can’t recall the last time I did a good deed just for my own gain. I’ve compiled a list of adventures and challenges to accomplish within the next two years, my 30 (Things to Do) Before 30. Most of the list contains items that I’ve always wanted to do, but blew off until tomorrow, and then unfortunately tomorrow turned into years of neglect. Of course some desires or goals take time and money. There are plenty of travels I would like to do in the next two years, but I tried to keep my list realistic. I still have quite a bit of work (and fun) ahead of me.
My wish isn’t to simply cross of items on a list, but to spoil myself, challenge myself, respect myself enough to stop pushing off my desires and leaving them in daydreams.
Jonathan made me a small birthday cake to take to work and share with my coworkers. When I returned home I found a new one, a banana-vanilla cake with blueberry-coconut frosting. Immediately I pulled out my phone to catch what little natural light we still had from the day, but he stopped me. He’d already taken photos. “I took them with the good camera. I thought you might want to show off your cake on the blog.” Ha. He’s the show off.
I’m so blessed.